


Make Me Over

by fleurjaune



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Confrontations, Denial of Feelings, F/M, Minor Adrien Agreste/Marinette Dupain-Cheng, Minor Emilie Agreste/Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth, Minor Injuries, Possibly Unrequited Love, Self-Esteem Issues, Transformation, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-17
Packaged: 2021-03-18 17:07:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 14,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29986089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fleurjaune/pseuds/fleurjaune
Summary: When Gabriel gives his latest akuma the ability to make people look like what they want to be he ends up uncovering more than he bargained for.
Relationships: Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth & Nathalie Sancoeur, Adrien Agreste | Chat Noir & Nathalie Sancoeur, Gabriel Agreste | Papillon | Hawk Moth/Nathalie Sancoeur
Comments: 74
Kudos: 82





	1. Chapter 1

He stared listlessly at the screen. The trouble with akumatising people when he was supposed to be working meant that he then had to do his _actual_ work of keeping his company afloat another time. Which, admittedly he knew that he was already an anomaly amongst his countryman for the amount of hours he worked, but this was starting to get completely ridiculous. Even Gabriel Agreste needed _some_ time off.Yeee’s

At least Nathalie had taken Adrien to a photoshoot so he didn't have to fear any interruptions from that corner. Not that Adrien was all that likely to actually physically interrupt him-his son was too well behaved and well trained for that, and the same meant he’d never verbally complain about it either, but nonetheless at times Adrien had his mother’s trick of turning those green eyes on him in silent accusation of abandonment.

Sometimes it almost made him want to make another u-turn and tell Adrien the truth after all. To face the boy and say, _I'm so busy because I'm trying to get your mother back, can't you just wait for her?_

It wasn't as if Adrien was unoccupied or even alone. He’d sent him to school. He’d filled his days with as many extracurricular activities as Nathalie deemed physically possible to prevent Adrien from having the time to brood on Emilie’s absence, or indeed from seeking out his own lacking company. And yet sometimes he’d still catch the slightest suggestion from Nathalie that Adrien was dissatisfied. 

But the only way he could fix it was the only way he could fix all of it.

He needed to win.

He needed to save Emilie.

As if summoned by his thoughts he felt the chance for an akuma swirl through his Miraculous. A muddle of emotion between two people from the feel of it, so, lucky circumstances aside, there would be decision to make, if he did go ahead and send an akuma out.

He looked back at the screen and his undone work. He looked over at Nathalie’s empty desk. No chance of Mayura’s aid then, but that might be no harm without any plan to justify the danger it put her in, and besides at least no one should be looking him on Saturday so there’d be no need for her to cover for him.

He turned and headed to his lair.

* * *

As the Butterfly flew, Hawk Moth considered the options. Anger or sadness. Defensiveness of someone they cared for or desperation to become someone else. A wish to help another or the need to help oneself.

The latter was more along the usual lines of his Akumas but he couldn’t help but recall a conversation he'd had with Nathalie the other week.

It had taken some prompting but eventually she’d admitted, “I was thinking, wouldn’t it be easier if we could somehow create an akuma people would _support?_ Make Ladybug and Chat Noir the bad guys for once?”

He didn't think this had been _exactly_ what she'd been envisaging but he knew well the strength of self-interest and vanity when it came to down to it. He'd practically made his money on it.

“Hello,” he said as he made the connection, “How would you like the power to make your sister look exactly like what she wants?”

The girl took the offer.

Through her eyes, he watched as her sister cowered away from the her akumatised form but there wasn’t room for the younger girl to run, and she shut her eyes as the power hit her, only to open them a second later in confusion assumedly because she was still living, unhurt, and uncompelled.

Then she looked down at her hands with their now-perfect complex nail art, and down to her body, got up and ran to the mirror and shrieked in what he thought was probably excitement.

He was suddenly very glad Adrien was a boy if _this_ was what teenage girls were like.

He wasn't sure that the transformation was that much of an improvement himself. It looked slightly uncanny as it she’d somehow been photoshopped in real life, but it was in very in line with the style favoured by young people these days with the large doe eyes and tumbling dark hair.

* * *

It was enlightening seeing the effect the akuma’s powers had on people. If Ladybug lost this time then there were going to be a _lot_ of doppelgangers of celebrities walking around. He wondered slightly uneasily if any of them were impersonating _Adrien,_ and how he'd find his actual son if they were but that was a question for another day.

Some people were more obviously going for better versions of themselves, and others for people who looked so unlike the original person that he presumed it was based on _someone_ but it wasn’t anyone he recognised. Rainbow hair colours appeared on multiple young people and even a few older ones. Personally Gabriel was most impressed by the woman whose nose had changed so subtly he wouldn't have been sure it _had_ changed if he hadn’t seen her get caught in the spell.

He almost felt like he should be noting the effects down to see what people were interested in these days.

However he was busy enough trying maintain the mental connection and reminding his champion to go after Ladybug and Chat Noir and to tell the others she transformed that Ladybug would all turn them back if she got the chance.

As it was he didn’t even notice everyone that got transformed.

Eventually the two heroes came into sight, and he realised with some trepidation that, while some people _did_ seem to be trying to reason with Ladybug to leave them as they were, the powers granted by his akuma weren’t actually particularly helpful for _fighting_ the heroes.

His best chance lay in if he could perhaps get the girl to hit one of the _heroes_ and exploit their weaknesses _,_ but that might yet backfire. Chat Noir he was less certain of but _Ladybug_ seemed like the type to get all moral about that sort of thing and claim that she didn’t deserve an appearance given to her by magic.

She might however be more conflicted about taking it away from her _partner._

In fact he was just wondering where Chat Noir was when he spotted the hero fighting, with a blue figure in the distant. _Mayura._ Nathalie must have managed to lose Adrien somewhere and transform.

He felt a slight bit of discomfort at that notion. Hypocritical when he’d taken no attempt to ensure Adrien _wasn’t_ caught up in the attack, but he’d always considered that to be a failing of his _own_ for Adrien to forgive him for when he gave his son his mother back. The idea of Nathalie abandoning Adrien felt different somehow, and not just because she was putting _herself_ in danger at the same time.

There was no time to think about that anyway especially since he was sure Adrien had been left somewhere safe, and besides it’s not as if the akuma could actually _hurt_ him. He might even be safer in public than usual given no one would be sure he was actually Adrien Agreste.

His own eyes were on Ladybug, where having _also_ spotted Chat Noir and Mayura, she was attempting to make her way to them instead of arguing with the people begging her to leave the akuma be.

Thankfully Ladybug seemed to be struggling since she didn’t quite seem able to bring herself to force people out of the way with her ability but it did make him worry.

_Damnit Nathalie._

She should have transformed in private somewhere and just sent out a sentimonster. Going out herself like this was an unnecessary risk. If she _had_ released an amok-which he’d seen no sign of, then her attention would be split and if she hadn’t then there was no advantage in sending _herself_ out instead of an amok.

She could get hurt. She could get _exposed_ as herself if that brooch got taken.

What on earth had she been thinking?

He didn’t dare try to contact her through his staff when it would only risk distracting her but he opened the rose window further just in case it looked like he needed to intervene.

Though with his attention on Ladybug it wasn’t until from somewhere behind him he heard Chat Noir yell that he realised how close Mayura and Chat Noir must have got to his akuma.

Although he had no idea what the hero meant by, “Who the hell are you anyway? Hawkmoth’s _new_ girlfriend?” 

He sent a mental command to turn and see what was going on, and the girl did only to see—

“ _Emilie?”_

Her name was out of his mouth almost before his brain could realise what he was seeing. 

Because Chat Noir wasn’t fighting _Mayura._

He was fighting her predecessor.

Which was impossible except _that_ was what he was seeing in front of him, a woman in blue true, but shorter than Mayura, and with longer hair gathered up behind her head, and a feathered shape hat ornament of instead of a hat. Even the dress harkened back to an earlier decade. And he’d seen all of this before.

A woman with blue skin and pink eyes but for all that still _Emilie’s face._

His cane clattered to the floor in shock, as his heart accelerated in his chest.

Everything seemed unreal as if he was watching through some type of filter as Chat Noir gave a quick glance backward, and Gabriel realised that he must have been connected through his akuma when he’d said that.

He could feel vague confusion through it as the girl under his control asked, “What? What did you want me to do? Who’s Emilie?”

The Peacock Miraculous’ wielder’s eyes, _Emilie’s eyes,_ widened as she heard the girl ask the question, and she looked down at herself for a moment, and gave up ground against Chat Noir.

He was almost out the window in an instinctive move to defend her, when then she looked up and for one second she made direct eye contact with him, and he knew she knew he’d seen her, before she shoved the hero away, turned on her heel, and _fled._

He froze. “Emilie?”

Her name echoes around the empty room.

He doesn’t even know why he said it because in that that second, when her eyes had met his, and he’d seen the sheer panic in them he’d recognised that expression exactly.

And not from Emilie.

He went back for his cane, because he felt he needed it to support himself.

 _Nathalie_ must have been hit by his akuma’s powers. Or maybe Mayura had been since it had been his wife _transformed_ he’d seen and not his wife herself. He hadn’t noticed Nathalie getting affected but they’d altered oh-so-many people that almost wasn’t a surprise.

Either why that had been _Nathalie._

Not Emilie.

Nathalie.

Nathalie’s who when given the chance of fulfilment of her desire to become someone else apparently decided to _become Emilie._

He’d not even thought to imagine what effect it might have had on Nathalie had _she_ been subject to his akuma’s powers. There were, he supposed, changes that could be made to her appearance to bring her more in line with standard beauty standards but he was so used to seeing Nathalie as she was that he’d never really thought about how he’d _improve_ her.

Still if he had he’d have only thought of perhaps Nathalie but more refined somehow into someone flawless, or perhaps he’d have thought she might have harboured some secret to return to having _all_ her hair that bright red, like some people had done.

He’d certainly never have assumed she’d want _to become Emilie._

That someone might was no surprise. He’d seen plenty of people out there apparently set on mimicking their idols and Emilie, in his admittedly biased opinion, was the most gorgeous woman in existence.

But for _Nathalie_ to. That was something different. Nathalie _knew_ Emilie. She _knew_ the situation. Even by their standards he couldn’t find it anything other than bizarre, and it made him feel unsure sick to think of it.

Nathalie _knew_ Emilie. Emilie was a person to her not some far off famous face.

And besides Nathalie had never ever given any hints of this. She’d had different hair colours over the years but never blonde. She’d shown a firm disinterest when he’d asked if she’d ever considered trying contacts when he’d been considering it himself. Both women might favour suits but where Emilie favoured pastels Nathalie stuck to the opposite end of the spectrum with blacks and navys with bright shots of colour.

He’d struggle to find a women who seemed _less_ like she was emulating Emilie.

So it was reasonable not to have expected this.

Reasonable to have had joy spark in his heart on seeing Emilie’s face.

Reasonable to feel betrayed at Nathalie’s apparent desires.

God. He almost felt uncomfortable at the idea of her being in the house and being _that close_ to Emilie now.

Perhaps they _should_ work from the office or she should be least. Perhaps he should fire her though he had no idea how he’d explain that officially. Not that she looked likely to fight it not with how she’d fled.

_Fled._

Here he was wondering if it was safe for Nathalie to be in their lives when for all he knew she was already trying to absent herself from them. She’d never had wanted him to know this twisted wish she had to emulate his wife.

A chill runs down his spine.

Because there _is_ one very big way in which Nathalie _has_ tried to emulate Emilie.

The Peacock Miraculous.

He’d always believed her when she’d said she wanted to help him, but maybe she just wanted to be _more like Emilie_. Still though with the damage it had taken, to _want_ to end up like Emilie in that coffin it just didn’t make sense. She’d _seen_ how losing Emilie had torn their family apart and—

Perhaps he’s looking at this the wrong way.

Nathalie has always claimed to want Emilie back.

If that _is_ true, then magic which grants people’s wishes but can only effect their appearance, then, well that might just consider making _her_ Emilie to be fulfilling its role. He’d been fooled for that moment after all. Had wanted to be fooled.

But what he needed now is the _truth._

And for that he needed to find Nathalie.


	2. Chapter 2

Adrien cursed mentally and ran after Not-Mayura who hadn’t even been polite enough to introduce herself but apparently didn't have any issues using the Peacock Miraculous’s powers. In fact she might have even been faster than Mayura, though he admittedly didn't have much chance to compare since he’d rarely been chasing her predecessor. It wasn’t as if Hawk Moth and Mayura ventured out much.

He officially had no idea what was going on, or why someone else had had the brooch. He'd thought maybe at first that Mayura had been hit by the Akuma too, which seemed reckless on Hawkmoth’s part but then he guessed it wasn't like the Akuma was exactly dangerous. Not in the normal way anyway. And maybe Mayura had _wanted_ to be transformed.

But if that was the case he didn't understand why she hadn’t admitted it when he'd asked. Not that he expected a villain to be _helpful_ but there didn't seem any reason to just blankly refuse to respond. Especially at that jab about Hawk Moth replacing her.

And the idea that apparently she was some sort of replacement for Mayura, either because the villains had broken up, or because Mayura couldn’t come for some reason and had sent a friend or sister or _someone_ out in her stead didn’t explain why it had looked like she was running _from Hawk Moth._

Though it she wasn't on Hawk Moth’s side then she was doing a very odd job of attempting to thwart him by fighting Chat Noir _,_ and running from the Akuma.

Although in fairness he didn’t think she'd been looking for him. He’d ran into the tent he’d been using as a dressing room to transform as the pink light of the akuma’s spell had swept over them, and when he’d emerged as Chat Noir from the other side, there _she’d_ been almost as if she'd done the same thing from the other tent reserved for the female model he'd been working with.

And Adrien admittedly _had_ made the first move and she _had_ seemed oddly reticent but she’d got into the fight enough as it went on.

And Hawk Moth _had_ seemed to recognise her, and he hadn't exactly seemed _angry_ at seeing her as if she was an enemy, though it was hard to tell from hearing what the Akuma had said.

In fact he wasn't sure he'd have heard the akumatised victim’s question at all if she hadn’t said his mother's name. Not that she had anything to do with this; it’s not like Emilie was an uncommon name but he _hoped_ it didn't belong to anyone connected to Hawk Moth for her sake.

Come to think of it he hoped Hawk Moth’s name wasn’t Adrien. He'd hate to share a name with a supervillain. Though he thought Hawk Moth seemed a bit old to be an Adrien thank goodness.

Though the idea of this maybe Emilie having some connection to Hawk Moth or Mayura made some sort of sense. If Mayura didn't wear her brooch constantly the way he wore his ring, which seemed cruel to her Kwami but then it wasn't a surprise she wasn't a good person, than maybe someone she knew had found it and put it on not realising what it was.

In that case it was easy to see how someone could be pretty conflicted if they’d picked the brooch up not knowing who they were and then found out someone they cared about was _Hawk Moth,_ or _Mayura._

Adrien had no idea how _he'd_ deal with that, and he’d had to actually consider the idea of his father being Hawk Moth before.

Still. As sympathetic as he could maybe be if those were the circumstances this would be much easier if she would just, “Stop running! I just want to talk.”

Not-Mayura didn't seem to find this very convincing as she ran round a building and—

Disappeared apparently.

He looked around but there was no sign of a supervillain or a maybe-not-supervillain _anywhere._

Unfortunately the square was fronted by multiple shops, so she _could_ have ran into any of them but he didn’t see Mayura

He was looking through the window of a Carrefour City trying to judge if the lack of fleeing people suggested she wasn't in there when movement caught the corner of his eye.

He turned, and couldn’t breath for a moment because there was his –

“Maman?”

His mother froze and part of Adrien absently noticed the loose bun she’d thrown her hair up in was an unusual style for her but then she’d been gone so long it made sense she might change.

“I’m so sorry,” she said holding her hands up and shattering his hopes, “I'm not your mother,”

“The spell,” his whispered as if he could somehow be wrong and he could have his mother back after all. “You got hit by the Akuma didn't you?”

His heart was still beating a mile a minute as if it hadn't got the message, as if it hadn’t admitted the truth, that his mother was still gone and what he was seeing was just some obsessive fan or something.

At least she looked guilty and she reached down to his shoulder and he let himself pretend for a little longer, as she looked at him like as cared about him.

“I’m so so sorry, I never wanted you to see this,” she said softly and then her eyes widened as she seemed to realise what she was saying, “ _Adrien?”_

He jolted, realising how much of an idiot he’d been, and how rightly cross Ladybug was going to be, and how she'd have to take the ring away from him, how _he_ should give the ring up if he was doing the right thing, how he'd lose Plagg, lose _her,_ and have to watch as another Chat Noir fought Hawk Moth with Ladybug and be unable to intervene, unable to _help,_ if anything went wrong.

“Adrien,” the copy of his mother’s panicked voice broke through his thoughts, “Adrien _breathe._ ”

He let her guide him down onto one of the chairs in front of the empty café next to them.

“It’s alright,” she said, “You’re going to be ok.”

It might have been more convincing if she’d sounded like she believed it.

He looked up at her and tried to pretend it was just like talking to Aunt Amélie, as if without the pain of thinking it was his mother he’d somehow be able to think straight enough to handle this, “I don't suppose you’d believe me if I said I'm not him?”

She shook her head, and there was something oddly familiar about the apologetic expression on her face for all he was sure he’d never seen it on his mother’s, “Unfortunately at this point I’m pretty certain I look like Emilie Agreste right now, so that really only leaves one possibility here.”

“You could look like Amélie Graham De Vanily.” He suggested in desperation, “I could be Felix.”

Her lips pressed together, “Trust me. I know which sister I’m meant to be. And good attempt but Felix lives in London. I don’t think he’s teleporting over to Paris to play superhero. Besides this all makes _way_ too much sense. I should have seen it earlier.”

Then she sighed again, and opened up her handbag and rifled through it before taking out a lipstick and applying it.

Adrien wrinkled his nose unthinkingly and was only glad his father wasn’t here to reprimand him for letting his emotions show on his face. The dark red didn’t look _bad,_ it just wasn’t one his mother favoured.

“Any better?” she asked.

Adrien considered the lipstick again and the bun, and came to a conclusion which didn’t quite make sense but, “Are you trying to look _less_ like her?”

“Is it helping?” She asked back.

He considered her still trying to make sense of this, as his body slowly seemed to come down from its adrenaline high. “You said unfortunately before, do you not _want_ to look like Maman?”

“Of course I don’t.” She said with some force, but then she just sounded tired as she continued, “You cannot even begin to guess how much I wish none of this had happened. No offence to your mother. She was stunning, really stunning, and I’m not pretending this isn’t an upgrade but you cannot _believe_ how much I wish I’d dodged that Akuma. How much I wish I hadn’t done this to you.”

“But the Akuma’s powers?”

He trailed off unsure how to say that she _had_ to have wanted to be his mother for this to have happened.

“Don’t make me explain that.” She begged, “ _Please_ Adrien. But trust me. I never wanted you to see me like this, I was trying to get as far away from you and your father as possible.”

“Father's at the house.”

For some reason that made her look over his head, as if he'd somehow appear in the street, but when she obviously didn’t find him all she said was, “I hope so.”

There was that weird familiarity again, and he frowned as if he could grasp it if he concentrated hard enough, and hope grew inside him as he started to see a way out, “Do I know you?”

Her face shut down blankly.

He continued. “I thought you were some sort of fan of hers but that apology earlier, _that_ sounded personal.”

She answered quickly. “Anyone would feel bad for putting the son of someone they admired though this.”

Adrien wasn’t convinced. “And you know about my Aunt and Cousin.”

“Your parents are famous.” She tried to point out.

He continued. “And you thought you should have worked out I was Chat Noir before.”

“You _voiced yourself_ in a film. All of Paris should have worked it out!”

She sounded slightly hysterical but that only fed his conviction that she was so thrown by him being Chat Noir because she had reason to be.

“No that’s not it.” He disagreed because, “There’s something familiar about you, there _is._ ”

“Adrien _don’t._ ”

It was that last attempted order that did it, because it actually did make a lot of sense, and because he realised, he _recognised_ that handbag, “ _Nathalie?”_

“No.” She tried to deny it but he _knew_ what Nathalie denying things sounded like. This _was_ Nathalie and that was _weird,_ and had a whole host of weird implications but he could deal with all of that later.

“I know it’s you.” He told her.

“No.”

“Who are you then?”

She didn’t say anything.

“Look, this is a good thing.” Nathalie _knew_ how to keep secrets and be private. She did it for his family all the time. There was a reason his father felt able to rely on her. “I can trust you.”

Weirdly she went pale at that. “ _What?”_

He reached out to her, sat down as they were he could easily reach her shoulders, to keep her here, and to look her directly in the eyes. “You can’t tell anyone. You can’t tell anyone I’m me. Including Father,” he grimaced at how that would go, “Especially Father.”

She shook her head again. “He’s your _father._ He should know.”

“He’d never let me out of the house again.”

“Maybe that would be a good thing.” She didn’t seemed to have quite processed everything yet if the speed she was talking as if she could convince herself was any indication, “I can’t believe you've been Chat Noir all this time, that we’ve,” she stuttered, “been letting you put yourself in danger all this time.”

Thankful for once for how much he had to rein himself in around his father he managed not to roll his eyes and to concentrate on being convincing. “Nathalie. I _know_ you don’t believe that. Not really. I know you helped convince him to send me to school.”

“To _school._ Not to be Chat Noir. Oh my god this is all my fault isn’t it? Is _that_ where you got your Miraculous? If I’d done what he wanted all this time would we have not,” whatever she was going to say she stopped herself, “it doesn’t matter anyway. We've been sat out here too long. People will have seen. And they'll put Chat Noir talking to apparently Emilie Agreste together.”

“Not necessarily.” He pointed out, though she wasn’t wrong exactly, they should have been having this conversation in private, or he should have detransformed or something. “You could just be another person trying to convince me to convince Ladybug not to reverse the effects this time.”

“Your father will. And I can’t lie to him, not about this. If he, if _you_ got hurt I’d never forgive myself. He’d never forgive me.”

“Hey,” he said and though he _knew_ it was cruel but he had to pull out his best card, “you want to be like my mother right?”

“Adrien,” and the attempted warning in her voice was clear but she sounded more tired than anything.

“That’s why you’ve like this isn’t it? It’s not because you want to look like her, it’s because you want to fill the space she’s left.”

She shut her eyes, “I want the two of you to be happy. But not like this.”

“Yeah, I worked that out.” She certainly didn’t seem _happy_ at the situation like other victims were, but thankfully he had something concrete to tell her to help. “But you don’t have to be _her,_ to be there for us. You know that right?”

“I don’t think,”

“And anyway Ladybug _is_ going to have to change everything back so it’s not like we could just go home and pretend you’re Maman to my father anyway,”

Nathalie seemed to choke on thin air, and he reached up to give her a thump on the back.

When she stopped coughing she was looking at him like she’d never seen him before, and made several incoherent sounds before managing, “ _What?_ What sort of idea was _that?_ I think we need to supervise you _more_ given this _,”_ she gestured at him to indicate Chat Noir, “and if you’re having _those_ sorts of ideas.”

“I said I wouldn't work!” He tried to defend himself. “And that’s not the point. And anyway, you don’t need to pretend to be _her_ just so Father will notice you. Honestly I think he’s halfway,”

“He's not.” She interrupted him, “he _really_ doesn’t like me in that way,” she gave a dark laugh and sounded so unlike Nathalie he’d almost have thought he’d got her identity wrong, “he's probably not going to like me at _all_ after this.”

Adrien didn’t agree with that at all. “I think you’re wrong.”

She sounded completely unconvinced. “I'm not.”

“But my point is, it’s not about who you _are_ , it's about how you _act_. And if you want to be a mother to me then you _can,_ by acting like one.”

She looked incredulous. “By lying to your _father?”_

“Maman would.”

“You’re probably right.” She conceded, “Though,” she bit her lip, “don’t you want her back?”

Apparently Nathalie was as much in denial as his father was. He supposed she _did_ spend most of her time with him. It was probably easy to pick up his ideas.

“Yeah obviously but I know that can’t happen. I miss her but I don’t want our entire lives to be some sort of memorial to her the way father seems to. I don’t think she’d want us to be unhappy forever.”

She looked uncertain at his response, “But what it there _was_ a way?”

“What?”

As if she thought he’d just misheard her, she repeated herself, “What if there _was_ a way you could have her back? Wouldn’t you want that? Wouldn’t it be worth _anything?”_

“But there _isn’t._ I don’t understand what you’re saying. She’s gone.”

He felt jittery again, like he had when he’d first seen her. Some instinct was making him just want to run but that didn’t make any sense.

“I,” she exhaled in clear frustration, “urgh I shouldn’t be the one saying this. I should have just got on a train the moment I got transformed like this like I thought of and avoided all of this.”

“Wait,” Adrien suddenly realised in horror, “Is that where we’re near Gare du Nord?”

“I was thinking of the Startrain” she admitted, “but I don’t have my passport, so I guess it would have had to be something in the Schengen area.”

“Uh,” he swallowed and tried to remind himself that he’d found her, and he wasn’t going to be abandoned by another adult, and left almost completely alone with his father, “Do you not think that’s a _bit_ of an overreaction?”

“You cannot overestimate how much I don’t want to see your father after this.”

“He might not know.” Adrien pointed out, trying to find a way to salvage this odd direction the conversation had taken.

She sighed, “Trust me. He knows. And he’s never going to trust me after this. Unless. We get her back.”

And he was right back to confusion. “But how can we? I don’t see what we can do.”

“We can do something. Or you can.”

“What?”

He couldn’t see what on earth she was talking about. Though clearly her decision making abilities weren’t great at the moment.

Nathalie seemed to decide on something. “That grimoire.”

Trepidation bubbled in his gut, “Father’s?”

“Yes.” She said. “I’ve been, you could say trying to translate it for him, it’s very important to him because,”

“Maman gave it to him?”

“Exactly.” She agreed, “But anyway, it says that with _your_ Miraculous and Ladybug’s a wish can be made.”

He felt frozen in horror because _that_ , that could only mean, “You want to _wish_ for her back?”

“Yes.” She said as if it was the most obvious and sensible thing in the world. “ _I_ can’t just go up to Ladybug and ask her but _you_ can. You’re her friend. She’ll listen to _you._ ”

“Nathalie,” he said, and _he_ should be the one being disappointed here at having the possibility of getting his mother back dangled before him and yet it felt like it was her he was letting down gently, “I can’t ask that of her. Ladybug has a responsibility. And I’m supposed to help her. Besides the wish has a price.”

“Wouldn’t it be worth it?” She asked. “She’s your _mother_.”

“I,” he wanted to say yes, he so wanted to say yes, but “I don’t think so. I want my family back as much as you do but I don’t think this is the way to do it.”

“But,”

“We can be happy _together.”_ He tried to convince her, _“_ And if you and father know where she is somehow, or have some idea what happened to her then we can look for her together. I can even ask Ladybug to help somehow. But not like this.”

Finally something seemed to shift on her face. “You think Ladybug could help?”

“I don’t know. Especially since I still have no idea what happened to her. But she’d help if she can and she knows more about the Miraculous than I do.”

“I see.” She buried her face in her hands, “I have no idea how I’m going to explain this to your father. Or explain it to _you._ ”

“Explain _what?”_

But Nathalie’s attention was caught somewhere behind him, and she grabbed his hand, “Come on.”

“What?”

She stood up tugging him with her, “Go in that café, de-transform and go out the back door. I’ll meet you there.”

He tried to see what she was looking at but he couldn’t from this angle.

“Don’t let him realise you’re seen him,” she hissed.

That made him actually turn around, and he couldn’t even say he was surprised to see Hawk Moth watching them from a building above.

He stared back at his enemy and put himself between him and Nathalie.

“I can take him. I’ll keep you safe.”

“That’s _really_ not what I’m worried about.” She said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Broke: Adrien didn't get hit with the Akuma's powers  
> Woke: Adrien did get hit, but he's totally satisfied with how he looks given he's accepted publically to be Model Handsome, and while sometimes he might want to be less so because of the attention also doesn't want to lose his father's affection (yeah Gabe sucks), or lose his connection to the mother he looks so similar to.  
> Bespoke: Adrien was hit and what he wants to be most is the boy Ladybug likes.


	3. Chapter 3

Gabriel is yet to move.

She tried to prompt Adrien. “You should go, Ladybug probably needs you” 

If that didn’t work she didn’t know what would, and she _needed_ him to be gone before his father decided to interfere and did something worse than they’d already done.

Something worse than they’d already done to Adrien.

Adrien.

Her mind was screaming.

It had never been meant to be _Adrien._

That they had been fighting Adrien the whole time; that made a folly of the whole thing. This had been supposed to be _for_ Adrien. And for Gabriel. But how could Gabriel be satisfied at such a cost?

She wanted to scream out loud the way she was doing mentally.

She wanted to have never seen Adrien and to have fled out of France before Gabriel could have seen her like this.

But she couldn’t have any of that. All she could do was get Adrien safely out of the way so she could work out how to handle this complete mess.

Unfortunately Adrien didn’t seem onboard with her plan. “It kind of seems like _you_ need me.”

Damnit. Of course Adrien would pick _now_ to start channelling some of his father’s overprotectiveness. She didn’t even know why she was surprised when right now she looked like the mother he'd lost. It’d be stranger if Adrien wasn’t protective.

She fell back on lying, “I doubt Hawk Moth will be interested in me once you’re gone.”

“Right.” Adrien agreed but she could see the uncertainty in his eyes, “Yeah, of course. It’s my Miraculous he wants.”

“Go.” She told him. “Leave and hide, and once he’s lost you, then go and help Ladybug reverse all of this.”

What she's going to do about the fact Gabriel’s been fighting his own son all this time she didn’t know but at least she didn't think he seemed likely to go after Chat Noir right now when it was _her_ he’d come out to confront.

Adrien still looked unsure, and she _recognised_ that expression on his face from many times he’d wanted to argue back and hasn’t. Now she knew who he was it seemed so obvious she couldn’t understand how she hadn’t seen it before. If they ever did get Emilie back and she was somehow still around to see it she had no idea how she’d ever explain _any_ of this to Adrien’s mother.

Eventually the boy followed her instructions, and she watched unhappily as he ducked into the café.

When she turned around Gabriel was in front of her.

“Really?” She said, “Are we going to do this _here_? In public?”

Apparently the father was as oblivious to the dangers to being seen talking to an Emilie Agreste where everyone could see them as the son was.

His face was composed under the mask but fury was burning in his eyes, and it sounded like a threat when he said, “it doesn’t seem like I can trust you to be there if I was to ask you to go back to the lair. In fact it doesn't seem like I can trust you at all.”

She couldn’t pretend that didn’t hurt even though she understood why he was saying it. “Look, I realise this looks bad,”

“That's an understatement.” He reached out with cane and brushed some of the loose hair she hadn't been able to get into her bun off her face, “Wanting to be Emilie? Conspiring with Chat Noir. Have you been sabotaging me this whole time? Did you think you were going to take her place?”

“Sir,” she gasped in offence, and it turned out between her fear and embarrassment and stress she was actually capable of being angry too, “How can you say that? You _know_ what I’ve done for you!”

“I do,” he sighed and his cane travelled down to rest against her shoulder, “That’s why I don’t understand any of this. Explain it to me. Explain how you could risk your life and then sit here chatting with our enemy wearing my wife’s face.”

She sighed. “I don’t know if he _is_ our enemy.”

And she didn’t know if she could bring herself to tell him that after Adrien had begged her not to, but she also _needed_ to tell him that before anything more when wrong.

“Of course he is.” Gabriel said apparently as blind to her inner turmoil despite his Miraculous as ever. “You seem to forgetting rather a lot Miss Sancoeur.”

“The same way _you_ what, forgot, that I and _your son,_ were out when you sent out that Akuma?”

The cane pressed into her shoulder, hard. “It never bothered you before.”

That was true, it had taken this complete humiliation and the revelation that Adrien wasn’t just a possible side casualty but their target to make her realise, “I think it should have.”

His nostrils flared and he shoved the stick forward with enough force that she stumbled back against the wall.

She glared back at him, trying to dare him to do more to her while she still looked like his beloved wife he was trying to save.

His eyes widened as if he hadn’t realised what he was doing.

“Nathalie, I,”

Only he was cut off as he was hit hard in the side himself by Chat Noir’s staff, and Nathalie watched in horror as Adrien said, “Get _away_ from her.”

“Chat Noir,” she called as if she could somehow salvage this, “It’s fine. _I’m_ fine. You should concentrate on the Akuma.”

Adrien looked at her betrayed, “You said you weren't in danger from him.”

“I didn’t think I was,” not _physically_ anyway, “Not looking like this.”

She took some satisfaction in Gabriel’s flinch from where he’d fallen on the ground, and watched as he tried to get up only for Adrien to notice despite his clear confusion at her statement. Adrien attempted to knock his father down again, but this time Gabriel met Adrien’s staff with his cane.

“I don’t know what weird fixation you have on Emilie Agreste,” Adrien said to his father, “But it ends now.”

Gabriel blinked. “ _What_?”

“She’s not Mme.Agreste.” Adrien declared.

“I’m _aware_ of that.” Gabriel snapped.

“And even if she was, she’d never ever look at _you._ Stop trying to play out whatever sick fantasies you have with your crazy Akuma.”

Gabriel looked faintly disgusted, “Trust me _._ This is the exact opposite of a fantasy for me.”

 _Thanks,_ Nathalie thought bitterly, but out loud she said, “So let Chat Noir go. Let him go fix this Akuma so I can get back to myself.”

Gabriel struggled to try to get up again, “if you haven’t noticed, _he’s_ the one fighting me here.” Then in imitation of his son earlier he suddenly said, “Wait. You _want_ to go back to being yourself?”

She could punch him. She really could. Even if she also wanted to patch him up afterward “Of course I do. Did you think I wanted _this?_ Do you think I ever wanted _you_ to see me like this?”

“But the Akuma,”

“You made it.” She pointed out. “You should know what it’s powers are better than I do.”

“It makes you into what you want to be.” He said.

She guessed as much but she still wished she’d been wrong. “It’s not Emilie I want to be.”

Gabriel still didn’t seem to get it.

“Nathalie?” Adrien asked frowning, “Why do you owe _him_ an explanation?”

At least neither of them were fighting each other anymore but that was cold comfort as they stared at her, and she felt the weight of all the Agreste’s secrets on her back.

“You know him.” Adrien suddenly realised, and for a moment she and Gabriel were in perfect harmony as their eyes met in horror as Adrien put it together, “And you appeared when I lost Mayura’s replacement. Or. Maybe that _was_ Mayura because you’ve been transformed by the spell so why shouldn’t she be top? And _he,”_ he spat out with some venom, “he recognised you as _Emilie._ Even transformed, but then,”

“Yes.” She interrupted him before he could spin out goodness knows what idea, “I’m not going to deny it.”

Gabriel’s eyes flashed with betrayal unnoticed by his son who was clearly still thinking.

“And Ma-“ he caught himself, “dame Agreste? _She_ worked with him too?”

There was such pain in his eyes that Nathalie just wanted to go over there and hug him and not let any of the world hurt this poor boy again.

Except she couldn’t because in the circumstances that would probably only make things worse, because _she_ was the one who’d hurt him, and by being here looking like Emilie

“No,” Nathalie tried instead, because she couldn’t let things get _worse,_ “Look I will tell you the truth. I _promise._ This really isn’t the place for it though.”

It was Gabriel’s turn to look at her liked she’d stabbed him, and she couldn’t do this, she couldn’t help both of them, she wasn’t _enough._

He snapped, “What do you _mean_ you’ll tell him the truth?”

She met his eyes. “Because the three of us have something in common. We all want Emilie Agreste back.”

“But,” Adrien was the first to talk, “I don’t understand. My, the Agrestes, they _were_ happy. Where does _he_ come in?”

Gabriel seemed to have finally started to figure some things out if how he was staring at Adrien was any indication.

And she took the chance to walk over to them and with some hesitation put an arm around Adrien’s shoulders in the hope her presence might at least be some sort of physical boundary between father and son, “They _were_ happy. You’re right, and whatever you’re thinking it's probably wrong.”

Adrien leant into her and her heart broke for this poor boy who’d take affection from the woman he’d been fighting,

“So this _thing”_ Adrien made that sound like a swear word, _“_ of his, it wasn’t reciprocated?”

She frantically scrambled for the right thing to say, especially in front of Gabriel. “The only man she loved was her husband.”

“But I don’t understand. Why would you work with him? You’re not a bad person.” His eyes darted around in confusion, “ _Wait._ This is to get her back isn’t it? That’s the only thing that makes sense. _That’s_ why you’re working with him.”

“I am _right_ here.” Gabriel said in irritation.

Adrien ignored him, “Does M.Agreste _know_? He must do, you’re with him all day, but surely he wouldn’t want you to do this?”

“No.” Nathalie said very aware of the man in question being right there. “He does. He wants her back. You know that.”

“Yeah, but it’s like what I said earlier. You don’t have to do this, leave him and join me and Ladybug.”

Gabriel interrupted incredulous, “Are you literally asking her to betray me _in front of me_?”

“You'd deserve it with the way you treated her.” Adrien hissed, “Seriously Nathalie I _hope_ your appearance right now is that I thought it was and not because of him because he does _not_ deserve you.”

“What?” Gabriel exclaimed, “How does _he_ know what this is about? How does he even _know_ you?”

She just looked at him in lieu of an answer

“Alright yes, I think I might know the answer to that last question.” He admitted. “I’m just hoping I’m wrong.”

“Wait, _what?”_ Adrien yelped, “Nathalie did you say something?”

She sighed. “How many teenage boys do you think I know?”

Adrien’s grip on her tightened, “Right I didn’t think about that. But if he knows who I am then you’ve got to help me, _please._ I can’t let him win. Even if it is for Maman. _Please._ Pick _me._ I know you’re doing this for my family, but I don’t want you to and if Father saw how Hawk Moth was treating you he wouldn’t either, and I think you should tell him the truth about why you’re like this,“

She tried to stop him, “I told you,”

He ignored her, “It’s a much better plan than fleeing the country with nothing,”

“What?”

Adrien looked surprised at Hawk Moth’s interruption, “You screwed up with this akuma. _She_ would have been on the StarTrain _ages_ ago if it hadn’t been for running into me.”

“Nathalie?”

His voice had gone all soft in that horrible caring way that made her want to luxuriate in it like velvet as if it wasn’t just some sweet poison giving her false hope.

“I told you.” She said to Adrien trying to pretend Gabriel wasn’t here. “It wouldn’t have been the StarTrain. I don’t have my passport.”

Gabriel didn’t take the hint. “You were going to try to _run?_ ”

Somehow it sounded like the thought had never occurred to him, and despite her years of working for him sometimes she couldn’t understand him at all.

“What was I supposed to do? Are you seriously pretending we can work together after _this?_ ”

“I still don’t even understand _this,”_ he held out his hands as if he was begging her, “Explain it to me.”

“I can’t. Don’t ask me to.” She’d been humiliated enough, and it wasn’t like she could explain in a way that would change his feelings about it.

“I think it’s obvious,” Adrien said, “Remember what I said, you just have to act like what you want to be.”

“I’m sorry,” she said to him, “I wish I could do that. You deserve that but I can’t be what you need,”

“You _could_ be. If you tried.”

“It’s not that simple, I’m not,”

“His mother,” Gabriel broke in and he put a hand on Adrien’s far shoulder as if to pull him away from her, “You’re not his mother.”

She swallowed at his censure, “Exactly. And I don’t think I’m going to be around after today so,”

“You think Father would _fire_ you?” Adrien looked distressed, “But you’ve always been there, and you’re the only person outside me and Maman he actually _likes,_ and that’s not _fair._ And I’ll talk to him because that’s stupid when he’s just in denial and,”

Gabriel let go of Adrien. “I’m _what?”_

Adrien’s eyes went wider than Nathalie thought possible, “ _Father?”_

Then he let go of Nathalie, “Actually yeah, that _does_ make a lot more sense.”

None of them were prepared for a flying glass to hit Gabriel in the head. Thankfully transformed it didn’t seem to do much to him other than irritate him and they all turned to see a teenage girl looking embarrassed by an empty table.

Adrien reacted for all of them. “ _Marinette?”_

“You look like you needed help.” She said, “But uh, maybe I should just go.”

Gabriel took a step towards the girl, and Adrien looked back at Nathalie in panic, and she nodded at him, and thankfully this time he took her gist and ran towards the girl and dragged her out of the square.

“What was _that?”_ Gabriel said. “If he tells Ladybug we’re screwed.”

“What was _that?”_ She turned it back at him, “What did you think threatening one of his friends was going to do?”

“This isn’t my fault.”

“This was _your_ akuma.”

He pinched at the bridge of his nose, “Come on. If we’re going to have to confront him then I want to be on home ground. Maybe if he _sees_ his mother he’ll understand.”

“He won’t make the wish,” she warned him, “We spoke about that. He doesn’t know the full story but, well, he seemed pretty certain. Though,”

“Though?”

“If there’s anything _else_ we could do I think he’d want to help.”

“There’s nothing. You know that.”

“Do we? We don’t know everything about the Miraculous Jewels.”

“We’ll see.” He said darkly, and prodded at her breast pocket with his cane, “Transform. I’m not carrying you home like this.”

“You don’t want to touch me,” she realised suddenly.

He looked at her brow furrowed in confusion. “You sound surprised.”

“I didn’t think looking like Emilie would make you pull away from me.” She pointed out.

“You look like her but you’re _not_ her.”

“I know.” She knew that full well because if she _was_ Emilie, then Gabriel would be looking at her very differently right now, and there would be any fear of him fighting Adrien and everything would be better.

“Please just transform.” He said.

A wild impulse made her reach her hand out towards him and he flinched and she would have been offended except, “You’re treating me like Amelie.”

“You know I always hated the fact someone could look so like Emilie and be so unlike her.”

Nathalie had never been quite sure of that but she conceded the point. “I know. Dusuu?”

Her Kwami peaked out from her hair.

“ _Transform me.”_

Gabriel sucked in a breath.

“I’m sorry.” She said.

“No, it’s necessary.” He said. “It’s just. It’s almost worse seeing you like this somehow.”

"Thanks."

He sighed, "I didn't mean it like that."

"I know how you meant it. And it doesn't matter anyway."


	4. Chapter 4

Marinette hadn't quite expected for Chat Noir to apparently decide she wasn't running fast enough once he’ll pulled her out of the square and literally pick her up, but it wasn't exactly a _bad_ turn off events. Certainly it was much better than trying to keep up with him, and his stupidly long legs as Marinette.

Only she wasn't actually sure when Chat Noir was going to _stop_ running and, “Um I don’t think they’re following us.”

She almost thought he hadn’t heard her, but then he shook his head and said, “What?”

“I don’t think Hawk Moth’s following us. You can probably stop.”

After all nice as this position was she did actually need to defeat this Akuma and she probably couldn't do that untransformed in Chat Noir’s arms.

“Right.” He said, and stopped but he didn't release her.

“Kitty?” she prompted him again.

“Sorry,” he said and finally let her down, but he still seemed distracted, glancing back behind him, and almost seeming to vibrate on the spot.

“Are you _ok?”_

“I mean apparently Hawk Moth’s my father, and he’s doing it to get my mother back, and I've just left him back there, with,” he stopped as if he wasn’t quite sure what to say.

Her heart broke for him at the confirmation she had heard what she’d thought she’d heard, but somewhere beneath her desire to embrace her poor kitty in the tightest hug imaginable and kidnap him back to her own house and never let him near his apparently horrible father again her brain kept working, “ _Wait,_ was that _Mayura?”_

She’d noticed that someone different had seemed to have the Peacock Miraculous but she hadn’t got a good look before she and Chat Noir had disappeared, but then she’d found him _with_ Hawkmoth and a woman, so it made sense she’d have to be Mayura only, “or not? She and Hawk Moth didn’t exactly look friendly.”

At that Chat made a sound that couldn’t even be truly called a laugh, even a hysterical one, “Uh yeah that’s one way to put it, because apparently she’s been working with him to get,” he stopped, “I shouldn't be telling you any of this, it’s putting a target on your back.”

Except she did need to know about this, and she might as well know now as later, and besides Chat Noir really looked like he needed to talk and, besides, “I threw a wine glass at Hawk Moth’s head. I think he already probably has it out for me.”

“Yeah, didn’t think of that.” Chat Noir conceded. “Why did you do that anyway?”

“I couldn’t leave you there, you looked terrified. I thought it might give you time for you and that woman you were with to escape.” She definitely hadn’t realised the woman was Mayura at that point, she’d kind of assumed some sort of relative of Chat Noir’s from the situation, “Um. You're not cross are you?”

Regardless of who else he was she _had_ just thrown a glass at Chat Noir’s father’s head after all.

“At _you?”_ He grimaced. “Trust me. You're like the only person I’m not cross at. But. Maybe don’t try and fight supervillains in the future unless you have a Miraculous.”

Having a Miraculous wasn’t actually the issue, but she couldn’t say that so, “I can do that.”

“Good.”

She felt a little awkward but she also felt like she had to ask, “So, um, Mayura’s ok right? I mean whatever she’s done surely he won’t hurt her?”

Hawk Moth was a dick who terrorised all of Paris and was apparently a terrible father but he _did_ seem to have genuine concern for his, his whatever Mayura was to him anyway, because Marinette had always kind of assumed they were probably together, which was probably sexist of her or something, but couldn't be the case if they were trying to get Chat Noir’s mother back unless something really weird was going on there.

And besides she’d kind of seemed to be putting herself between Chat Noir and Hawk Moth earlier which had to suggest she thought she'd be some sort of barrier. Though Chat Noir shouldn't _need_ protecting if Hawk Moth was his own father, unless Hawk Moth just was that terrible that even _Mayura_ didn’t think that was enough to keep him safe.

Unfortunately Chat Noir didn’t seem to agree and she could just _see_ he was panicking as he said. “I mean if you had asked me that literally minutes ago I would have said no, but there was a _reason_ I had to intervene between them earlier. It certainly didn’t look like he wasn’t going to hurt her.”

He sighed, “I think that's why I didn’t work it out once I worked out _her_ identity when there’s literally no other man it could be if she’s Mayura, because whatever else he’s like I never thought he’d physically hurt _her._ But then I didn’t think he was Hawk Moth either when we’ve been living in the same house all this time so apparently there’s a lot he’s capable of I didn’t realise.”

He was beginning to speak faster and faster as he continued, “And now I've left him with her, but I can't just go back to look for them because I don’t even know if they’re still there and besides I’ve also abandoned Ladybug to that Akuma and I have no idea if she's ok, or where she is either, or how we’re going to fix this because she’s the ideas person, while I’m apparently too stupid to work out my own father is Hawk Moth.”

“You’re not stupid.” She disagreed fiercely. “It's not a bad thing to want to trust your family, and he was obviously working to hide it from you. This is on _him,_ not you.”

“OK.” Chat Noir nodded. It looked oddly automatic.

She tried to inject authority into her voice, through it was a _much_ easier thing to do as Ladybug compared to as Marinette. “And you’re _right,_ we do need to concentrate on the Akuma first because we don’t know where Hawk Moth might have gone. We can deal with him after.”

“OK.”

“And Mayura, well, I still don’t think he’d hurt her but she _does_ have a Miraculous of her own, and again we have no idea where they might have gone now.”

“OK.”

“And Ladybug’s _fine._ I saw her earlier.”

For a certain level of fine anyway. It wasn’t like she was hurt or anything but much as Chat Noir might think she always had the ideas at the moment she was actually kind of stumped as to how best to approach this akuma because transforming into Ladybug meant attracting the very attention of people trying to stop her playing her part that she’d fled by de-transforming in the first place.

Not that _everyone_ was happy with their transformations. Or with the transformations of people they knew. Honestly she hadn’t quite been able to make everyone’s arguments out in the tumult of earlier. Still she’d rather not know what effect this might have had on any of her friends or family-though she was sure she’d prefer them all as they originally were anyway.

Chat Noir still looked uncertain. “You’re sure?”

“I’m sure.” She tried to sound as convincing as possible, “Ladybug wasn’t injured or anything. It just looked like she retreated to regroup or something. I mean she’s the one who creates the temporary heroes isn’t she?”

“Oh right,” Chat said, “I forgot you’d know about that. Pity we don’t have Multimouse right now. She’d get past all these people and over to that akuma easy.”

“Yeah.” Marinette agreed, silently cursing the fact that Chat Noir knew _she_ was Multimouse, “That is a pity. But it’s not like I’m exactly someone easy for her to find out here. And I’m sure Ladybug has a plan.”

She _hoped_ Ladybug would have a plan soon.

“Yeah,” Chat Noir’s hand went to the back of his head, “I should probably try and find her shouldn’t I?”

“Probably.” She said, wishing she didn’t have to keep up this pretence. It would be _easier_ if she could just tell Chat Noir that _she_ was Ladybug but if Hawk Moth was _his father_ and apparently he wanted her Miraculous to help _his,_ possibly-dead though he hadn’t been clear what he’d meant by back _, mother_ then that seemed like an unfair amount of temptation to put on him.

Not that she didn’t _trust_ Chat Noir. She did. But to hold in your hands half of what could get your mother back and not be able to use it, well Marinette didn’t know if she could even blame someone for being tempted by that. _She’d_ be tempted by that if it was her mother and her heart gave a skip at just the imagined image of her mother hurt or gone.

Giving him the identity of the other holder and dangling the full set of what was needed in front of him could only make things worse.

“Uh,” Chat Noir said, eyes wide as if he’d just had another unpleasant revelation of his own, “Ladybug still looked like Ladybug right? She wasn’t hit by the akuma’s powers?”

“Um,” Marinette actually wasn’t sure about that, she thought she _had_ been hit, but she didn’t _think_ she’d changed at all, and Chat Noir seemed to recognise her just fine so _probably_ she hadn’t been but, “I don’t think so? I mean it wasn’t clear whether or not she got hit at one point but she didn’t look any different?”

“Huh. I guess maybe she’s just totally satisfied with how she is. Makes sense. I can’t think of a thing I’d change about Ladybug.”

“I’m, sure she’d love to hear that?” Marinette offered awkwardly. Honestly she couldn’t really think what she’d change about herself but she was still kind of surprised that it was apparently nothing.

“I hope so, um,” That sheepish expression came back to his face, “I mean I wouldn’t change anything about you either, I mean you’re great, I mean you’re really pretty, but anyway I guess you missed it too then?”

“I guess.”

Something in her tone must have given away her uncertainty because he very obviously looked her up and down, then took a step away, to do it again, and then came very close holding a hand out over her head.

“Wait,” he said, “Are you _taller?_ But like barely taller?”

“ _Am I?”_

Looking up at him this close she could have thought that maybe he was _right._ Chat Noir’s face did seem closer than usual and if there was another Dark Cupid or something it’d be much easier to lean up and press her lips to his.

And Adrien was probably about Chat Noir’s height and that was really not a train of thought she needed to get distracted by right now.

“I think so.” Chat Noir said, “But why would you be _barely_ taller? Like I could get wanting to be taller but surely it’d be more obvious.”

“Yeah no that’s weird,” she frantically tried to not let any of her thoughts show, “But uh, maybe we should focus on Ladybug?”

“You’re right. Though honestly I’m not sure whether I got hit or not,” Chat Noir said, “So maybe our Miraculous protect us?”

They definitely did _not,_ but she couldn’t say that. Thankfully there was another option, “I thought Mayura looked different? Transformed I mean-I have no idea what she looks like normally.”

“No she definitely got hit,” he said darkly, and she wondered at what that meant and at who exactly Mayura was in his life, and at how different she looked, “but I don’t know if she was transformed as Mayura when she was.” Realisation flashed over his face, “Actually I think that might have been _why_ she used her Miraculous.”

“What? You think she’d be embarrassed by how it changed her? Or?”

“Yeah, at _best._ ” He blew air out his nose, “I think maybe she was trying to protect _me._ Which is ironic.”

Again there was something in his voice that suggested that whatever had happened was worse than whatever Marinette had imagined.

Though it _did_ sort of bring the incessant whisper that had been haunting the back of her mind to the forefront, “You don’t have to answer,” though he’d have to tell _Ladybug_ once she managed to get away and transform again, “but I kind of thought Mayura looked a bit like Emilie Agreste?”

“Think exactly,” Chat Noir said, “I’m impressed you recognised her, she hadn’t acted in anything big for a while before she disappeared.”

“Adrien’s,” the boy she’s in love with, and of course she’s googled literally everything about him, “my friend. I should recognise his mother.”

Chat Noir frowned, “She disappeared before Adrien went to school though.”

She shrugged. It seemed safer than saying anything, but he was waiting for an answer and instead she said, “I guess Mayura wouldn’t want to admit that she was _that_ obsessed with looking like an actress but,” her mind came to a screeching halt, “why would she try to hide that to protect _you?”_

“Um.”

“ _Adrien?”_

It had come out more like a squeak than his actual name but from his wince he’d heard right anyway.

“Ladybug is going to kill me.”

Her brain was still screaming a continuous loop of _Chat Noir is Adrien Agreste, Adrien Agreste is Chat Noir, I rejected Adrien Agreste,_ when he said it but eventually his words sank in. If after an embarrassing amount of time from how Chat Noir, from how _Adrien,_ was staring at her.

“I think in the circumstances she’d understand.” Besides it had been half her fault as much as anything for pushing the question, when she should have known that she probably didn’t need the answer, and that it was probably dangerous.

“Yeah but, _my father,_ I’ve just put you in more danger.”

“Not really, it’s not like he knows,” Then the rest of her brain caught up with her, “Oh my god Gabriel Agreste is Hawk Moth. I _knew_ it.”

“You, uh, you _did?”_

Right. _Ladybug_ had been the one with reason to have suspicions about his father, _Marinette_ only knew, “I knew there was _something_ wrong with him.”

“Everyone but me knew apparently,”

“Adrien,” she took his hand, “again, this is not your fault. I mean if he’s always been like that how would you know better?”

“He hasn’t. Always been like this. Or I guess in some ways maybe, but it all seems to come back to my mother.”

“I’m sorry.” She offered again, feeling like she was totally falling short of being able to offer any real help.

“It’s _really_ not your fault.” He said with some feeling.

A flash of pink light at the end of their street caught their attention and both of them ran towards it only to catch sight of the very girl they’re supposed to be fighting and freeing right now, instead of exposing half their secrets to each other.

And not too far away was—

“Ladybug!” Chat Noir said with such faith it made Marinette feel unworthy. 

And _worse_ that definitely wasn’t Ladybug and even if she trusted whoever apparently wanted to be her that much she had no idea if these transformations would have given the recipient her powers too though she tended to doubt it.

That said, “Chat Noir,” she grasped his hand, “wait. I have a plan.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't worry Adrien, your father won't hurt Nathalie _physically_ 🙃


	5. Chapter 5

The landed back in the lair and Gabriel turned back to window to stare out of it, as if by not looking at Nathalie it would be easier to hear Emilie’s voice and not believe on some level that he was talking to his lost wife even though he knew better.

“So what now?” He said.

“I don't know,” Nathalie replied before audibly sighing and dropping her transformation from the blue glow that reflected off the window, “I’d volunteer to go sit in another room until they fix this if I could but I suppose we need to talk.”

Then she coughed, and he started because even _that_ sounded like Emilie, and he _knew_ Nathalie wasn’t that bad, that she was going to be _fine,_ but despite all of that and his current irritation with her he couldn’t help but worry and told her, “Oh sit down for goodness sake. It’s not as if any of this is professional.”

From the noise behind him she’d followed his instruction but she didn’t say anything leaving it to _him_ to raise the elephant in the room. Only he had no idea how do start the topic, nevermind, as to what he actually wanted to say right now. Without any better idea he just said. “So?”

Nathalie’s answer came fainter than he expected, and he realised that she must have sat further from him than was really practical, “So what are we going to _do?”_

The pressure she was putting on _him_ to give in and turn around and came close didn't help his mood, especially he couldn’t at all see what they could, _“_ Do?”

“About the fact Chat Noir is Adrien? About the fact he's almost certainly going to tell Ladybug? About the fact he won’t agree to make the wish?”

His heart jumped in his chest at the reminder that he'd been so distracted by this mess with Nathalie, and his unawareness of her motives, and his own annoyance at how everything had planned out that he’d been ignoring the more urgent issue.

The fact was that his son was Chat Noir after all, and that most likely he’d tell Ladybug their identities immediately because, despite the fact Adrien _knew_ this was about his mother now, somehow impossibly he hadn’t seemed to see that that meant _he_ should join _them_ not vice versa.

Emilie would be furious with him.

Especially because as he felt he had to confess to Nathalie, “I don't know. I didn’t exactly plan for this.”

“I guessed _that.”_ She paused. “But you thought he was Chat Noir before didn't you? What was your plan _then?”_

 _“_ Nothing we can use now.” He admitted, and felt almost embarrassed, “I'd thought we could take the ring without him realising, or that if I just explained he’d join us. But it doesn’t seem like that from what you said.”

“No. No, he won’t betray Ladybug.” She agreed, echoing her earlier words on the subject, “And I don't think he thinks what we're doing is right. If there’s anything they _can_ do, then I think he'll do it for _his mother’s_ sake but. Well.”

“You don’t know what he’d do for _us._ ”

“Quite.”

He almost didn’t ask because he wasn’t sure him wanted the answer but, “Do you think he'd turn us in?”

“I don’t know.” Nathalie said sounding utterly exhausted and part of him still wanted to just bundle her off to bed despite how utterly insufficient this would be to sort any of this.

Strange how she still sounded like herself despite Emilie’s voice. Even drained by the Peacock Miraculous his wife had never sounded worn to the bone the way Nathalie did now.

He clasped his hands together behind his back before he could do something he regretted.

“Adrien seemed fond enough of you out there,” he said, and couldn't help but feel a little hurt that Adrien would extend sympathy to _Nathalie_ he wouldn't to his own father, “even after he realised you were Mayura he tried to get you to defect.”

“I look like her.” Nathalie said, “What do you expect?”

It did make sense that Adrien would be reticent to want to lose even a copied image of his mother, especially with how he’d been clinging to Nathalie out there as if she _was_ Emilie, but then he had apparently been ready to consider failing his _actual_ mother so it didn’t actually make sense at all.

As if he _could_ make sense of it he asked, “What did the two of you talk about?”

“What?”

He didn’t understand how Nathalie could sound so thrown by a perfectly obvious question.

“He didn't know you were Mayura but he knew some it.” He scoffed, “He seemed to understand _this._ ” He assumed she’d take his meaning without him having to say it explicitly.

Nathalie audibly swallowed, “He was thrown to see me. I’m sure you can understand that. And then _I_ was thrown to work out he was Adrien.”

“I can understand that too.” He conceded. He still hadn’t really processed it yet.

“Right. So that took up much of it. And then I tried raising the issue of Emilie-claiming we knew about the wish from the Grimoire. But I didn't get far before you appeared.”

Annoyed at the implication _he_ might have thwarted one of their chances he said, “I don’t know what you expected me to do.”

“I don't know. I hoped you’d let me flee I suppose, and then we could just never talk about it.”

“You were ready to leave me in the dark not knowing about Adrien?”

That almost felt like more of a betrayal than apparently wanting to be Emilie.

“This was more before. After, well, I didn't know what I was going to do then. It didn’t really seem important in comparison.”

Annoyed at the likely unmeant but still felt jab at his own priorities, he pivoted to a new line of attack himself, “What did you tell Adrien then?”

“What? I didn’t tell him about Hawk Moth, you know that.”

“No I meant how did you explain,” the only flaw of not looking at her was that he couldn’t gesture at her either, “what you look like?”

“I didn’t.”

“But he said he _knew_ why you were like this.”

“He made assumptions. I” she expelled a breath, “didn’t correct them.”

“Were they wrong?”

“Not really. It might have been a kinder reading of it than I deserve but, he had the essentials.”

She was being deliberately circumspect and it made him bark, “Which are _what_ exactly _?”_

Nathalie stubbornly remains silent.

Infuriated he finally turns around to face her, and finds her sat against the wall with her legs tucked up in front of her. She looks small and as unlike the Emilie he remembers as it’s possible to be while wearing her face. It almost makes him feel regret for snapping at her, but that irritates him too because if she would just admit what was going on so he could know where he stands with her then he could focus on _Adrien_ and on what the hell they’re going to do.

“Nathalie,” trying another tactic he walks over to her, and crouches down trying to sound understanding, “I just want to understand.”

“I get that. But does it really matter now? This isn’t exactly the important thing.”

“It’s distracting. And I don’t know how I’m supposed to plan anything with you when apparently I don’t know you.”

She looks down at her lap, “I wanted to make you, to make _your family_ , happy ok?”

He can’t quite keep the disgust out of his voice. “You thought _this_ would make me happy?”

“No,” she says finally looking up at him and he’s finally managed to needle his way past her defences from the flash of anger in her eyes, “Of course not. Why you think? _This_ was never my plan. It’s _your_ akuma. It’s not like I had some plan to go around and masquerade as Emilie. That’s a horrid idea and it obviously wouldn’t work because _I’m not enough for you_ and I know that.”

He stares at her while his brain parses that sentence. He’d thought at first that it had simply been what he’d considered himself-that somehow Nathalie had wanted Emilie back more than she wanted any sort of improvement in her appearance and things had got a bit confused somewhere but that didn’t quite fit the spell and—

“You’re not enough for me,” he muses out loud and she flushes, “but you _want_ to be. And the spell made you Emile but you don’t want to be _Emilie_ you want to be,” his brain stutters at the rational endpoint of that and he manages to pull back, “you wanted to be able to make me and Adrien _happy_ you said, so then, you wanted to be able to fill her missing space?”

Nathalie buried her ( _Emilie’s)_ face in her hands. It was tantamount to an admission.

“But,” he started, “Emilie, _she,_ she was my _wife,_ you couldn’t support me in the way she did, not unless somehow we,” he stopped.

Nathalie had get to emerge.

“But you don’t, I,” the full implication of her transformation hit him like a truck and he could no longer avoid it, “you don’t have feelings for me, I’d have _known,_ my Miraculous should have told me.”

She mumbled something incoherent into her hands.

“Nathalie?”

He reached out to gently try and pull her hands away and they stiffened in her grasp but then she dropped them herself, but still spoke into her knees, “I was never certain you didn’t until now. I’m _good_ I think at holding things in, and I know you don’t exactly look for positive emotions with that brooch, and you _did_ say you’d not focus it on me and Adrien but sometimes I felt so obvious I thought you _had_ to know and you were just being kind.”

“Obvious?” He felt like his reality had been up-ended, “When did you ever do anything _obvious?”_

Her hand went to her Miraculous in a subconscious tic and despite the fact he’d been horrified the first time she’d used it, he’d never really thought about _why_ she’d done so because it had seemed obvious at the time. He _knew_ she’d been loyal, or he wouldn’t have been able to create Catalyst in the first place, and besides had he been caught then she would have been implicated too. It had been a terrible risk but an understandable one.

But she’d been happy to keep using it and he’d never really considered why. So used to her loyalty and her just being there and helpful he’d never questioned what was behind it all. Or why he’d been so comfortable with sharing this with her.

“Oh my god. You’re _in love_ with me.”

She frowned, “What did you _think_ it was? I thought you’re already worked it out?”

“I thought, I don’t know a crush or something, on top of your pre-existing affection for me and my family. We’ve been working together more closely,” he’s been _carrying her into bed,_ and _looking after her the way he did Emilie,_ and _sharing secrets with her the way he’d do with his wife,_ “and you’ve been spending even more time with Adrien. It seemed plausible you might have got confused.”

He felt vaguely ill at the whole situation. He wasn’t _ashamed_ of anything he’d done but it all felt like it read differently when he knew about her feelings.

“Confused.” She said she said with a huff.

He stared at her. “But I don’t understand _why?”_

“I don’t either sometimes.” She muttered.

“No, I mean, I’m _married._ ” He has unfortunately, on the very few occasions he’s been forced to leave the house, come into contact with woman who seemed to believe they could comfort him in his grief, and wheedle their way into Emilie’s place, and into access to his money, but for all their motives made him cringe at least they honestly tended to assume Emilie was gone forever. Nathalie knew better.

That crease in her brows came back. “I know.”

“But that means, you _know,_ that I can’t reciprocate.”

“I know. I didn’t expect you to, I didn’t even really think I _wanted_ you to but,”

“Then you got transformed into _my wife,_ which rather suggests you do.”

She exhaled. “Yes. Apparently.”

“But, if you thought I wouldn’t ever return your feelings then I don’t understand why you’d feel like that.”

She looked incredulous, “It’s not something you can just turn off and on like a tap. I realise it was pretty much Emilie and that’s it for you, but it’s fairly normal for most of the rest of us fall for people who don’t return our feelings at least once.”

“So you weren’t, trying to pursue me or something then, you just,” the concept is completely alien to him, “ _accepted_ I wasn’t interested?”

She gave a sharp nod. “Yes. I’d never do that to you and Emilie, and besides I’d only be making a fool out of myself.”

He was unsure of that, but she was right really when he’d never choose to betray Emilie. Still she’d have other choices. Such as, “why didn’t you leave then?”

“What?”

“Surely, it can’t have been _enjoyable_ for you to sit there watching me trying to bring Emilie back all this time?”

“No but,” her voice was steady but her eyes were watering, “I’ve been here _years._ I don’t have much of a life outside this job. Leaving it, leaving _you,_ would be like losing part of myself. I’m not even sure I know who I _am_ if I’m not Gabriel Agreste’s PA. And, this,” she gestured outwards and made a faintly disgusted face, “the romantic feelings, they’re just on top of what’s built up over the years, I already cared about you, about the brand, about _Adrien,_ about you getting Emilie back even. I wasn’t just faking that because I was in love with you and wanted to be near you. I didn’t want to abandon you before you won.”

“I’m sorry,” he said because there didn’t seem much else he could say. It was a sad picture she painted but even he knew it was hardly helpful to point that out.

“It’s not your fault, and _I’m_ sorry. About today.”

“Like you said. The akuma wasn’t your idea.” He paused. “Would you really have never said anything? Would you have been happy to watch me and Emilie together if I’d got her back?”

She shrugged, and winced as she did so, and he suddenly guiltily remembered what he’d done to her in that square, but she spoke anyway, “It would have been nice to see you happy instead of,”

“Like I’ve been. Yes I understand,” to some extent. He’d always delighted in pleasing Emilie, and he assumed he _has_ been pretty pathetic recently, “but, all that danger you put yourself in, was that really all for me?”

How he’d justified her reasoning for it before he wasn’t quite sure, and it’s probably hypocritical to be fine with letting herself martyr herself for loyalty but not for love, but somehow the latter seems worse.

“Like I said, I don’t have much of a life to leave behind so.” He must make some expression himself because she adds, “No one would miss me.”

“I’d miss you. I don’t,”

“I know.” She interrupts.

“But you’re a very good assistant.”

“Thank you sir,” she says drily.

Annoyed he tried to explain himself better, “I meant I don’t think I’d be able to rely on someone else the way I rely on you.”

“Probably,” she agreed but there was a twist to her mouth, and at first he thought it was his words that had prompted it, but she eyes glanced at her shoulder again.

Mouth suddenly dry he asked, “How is it? Your shoulder?”

She rolled it slightly. “Sore. But it’ll be fine.”

“It was badly done of me,” he hadn’t even meant to _hurt_ her. Just to keep her there in place and force the truth out of her. Only his skin had crawled at the idea of touching her. Right now he forced past it holding up his hand, “May I?”

“If you want,” she said, “though I’m fairly certain I’d know if you’d broken my collarbone or something.”

He reached under her jacket to feel around where he’d prodded her, and it did _seem_ ok but then, “It’s hard to tell without seeing it. Could you take your top off?”

She blinked. “I’m sorry?”

“You realise I’ve seen Emilie’s body before, and anyway I’ve fitted clothes on plenty of people, it’s not a big deal.”

“Yes but this is a bit different to that isn’t it?”

“I’m trying not to hurt you this time.”

She shut her eyes, “I don’t have the energy for an argument right now,” and shrugged off her jacket, and pulled out her top.

He’d been prepared to have to shield his eyes from his wife’s body but in fact they were drawn automatically to the red blotch just below her collarbone. He couldn’t help but think it was lucky he hadn’t hit her a few centimetres higher.

He reached out to feel just around it, “It think it’ll bruise.”

At that moment a glow shone through the window as Ladybug’s cure did its work and, the skin below under his hand paled a few shades, and the red only seemed to stand out more harshly.

Unthinkingly he pressed his lips to it as if to make amends, and only realised his mistake when she jolted underneath him.

“I’m sorry,” he offered, “I was just,”

“Trying to kiss it better?” She suggested, “I figured but I’m not a toddler.”

She’d gone completely red now, and unlike the flushed cheeks she’d had earlier as Emilie which brought to mind lively nights or cold days, this blush covered more of her face and he couldn’t help but think it ought to clash with her hair but in fact somehow it looked almost charming even though it shouldn’t have.

“No,” he’d been following her blush down her to her neck and was now uncomfortably aware of the amount of skin on show to him, “You’re certainly not.”

Now he was fairly sure _he_ was blushing. Really it seemed a waste if her life outside this house was as barren as she claimed.

She grabbed her top, now returned to her own polo neck, and pulled it over her head, “this is just my luck.”

When she emerged he noted absently that the lipstick she must have applied as Emilie, for it certainly wasn’t one of Emilie’s colours, had stayed on. Odd that but he supposed it made sense.

“The lipstick was a good idea.” He said. “And the hair.”

“Oh,” she said touching her lips, “Did it help?”

“As much as anything could,” it had been easier to remember who he was talking to earlier than he’d expected, but he was deeply relieved anyway to have Nathalie back as herself. “Come on,”

He got to his feet and reached down to pick her up and she flashed him a lock he couldn’t quite make out, but let him do so. “Let’s get you downstairs. We should get some ice for that.”

“And be somewhere Adrien and Ladybug can find us. Unless you _wanted_ to panic them.”

He stopped still. “I’d almost forgotten.”

“Sorry,” she said again, “Did you,” she paused, “ _want_ to try to escape?”

He shook his head and started towards the entrance, “No we have to confront them. If there’s _any_ chance, well, I owe Emilie that. You said Adrien won’t make the wish but would want to help.”

“It’s possible they might know a way to heal her we don’t.” Nathalie offered, “Our knowledge isn’t exactly complete.”

“I guess we’ll hope for that then,” he said, “And hope we can convince them.” Convince them not to expose them as much as anything else. He much preferred fame to infamy and that was without all the other likely repercussions.

“You can be very convincing when you want to be sir,” she said.

He tried to remind himself that she was _right,_ that he wouldn’t have been able to build his company otherwise but this was a far more important matter, “I hope so.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually really don't know where these two's relationship is going in this one...


End file.
